Dreams

Dream by Nayoun Kim

It is sometimes frightening to trust my intuition. It is always disastrous not to trust it. 

A spiritualist once told me to pay attention to my dreams and to keep a dream journal by my bed. She also told me I have the third eye. This seemed weird at the time but I think all she was reminding me to do was stay connected with my intuition and trust my inner voice.  After all, I've always been an intuitive person rather than a logical, linear thinker.

I've had some very significant dreams in my life that I will forever remember until I die. I've also had dreams that I dismissed as insignificant and meaningless.  I thought a dream is only a dream though Freud and Jung will disagree.

Recently, I've been having vivid dreams that are heartfelt and frightening at the same time. I've had dreams where a person who means so much to me hurts me in frightening ways and strangers become more meaningful. A loved one leaves and a stranger comes. Last night a stranger came and left with a smile. I wanted to ask him to stay but could not knowing it was not my time or place. An elevator door closed between us, leaving me to feel empty and powerless over my present situation.

It's funny how reality continues to play out in my dream as another layer to our existence.  Reality is materialistic, dreams are transcendent.  Suppressed feelings become magnified and suppressed anxieties play out in disturbing ways I don't even think about in my daily life.  God is telling me my intuition is more meaningful than the material world and that dreams can be a more accurate reflection of my soul than my daily actions.

Despite it all, I've been feeling a sense of peace, comfort and strength in my life. Attending group meetings with other women is definitely helping me to feel more connected with my inner self, inner God and put my surroundings into perspective. I'm now able to connect my inner trials with those around me by stories they tell and feelings they validate.

God is reaching out to me again and I feel strengthened and more at peace. My body is worn but soul is slowly being renewed.  My dreams continue and they remind me to stay connected with my inner voice that is God-- and for this, I'm grateful.

Without God, I am nothing and without God between us, we are nothing.