Love + Death, Eternity

The Perfect Lie by Artstudio Norarts

A little over a week ago, a dear friend lost her 31 year old husband unexpectedly and it has been heart wrenching to watch someone so young, bright & vibrant endure such a tragic loss. I also learned a lot, one important lesson being that loss, sadness & grief are all relative feelings and that it is up to the affected person to give it a beautiful or monstrous facade. My friend dealt with her sudden loss with so much grace, faith and beauty that my husband commented he saw an angel at the funeral service. Even in our 6 years of marriage and 14 years of friendship I know I never became this angel--- and I'd hate to wait until his death to become one.

As I sat in front of the open casket adorned with red roses, my eyes welled up with tears not of sadness but of joy. One's soul does live on upon death because I felt his presence all around me. He is now an angel teaching me that I do not yet know how to love. I know how to ask, seek and take but do not know how to love selflessly. I know how to love in my way with my own set of expectations but I do not yet know how to love selflessly. I envision selfless love to be something I must try, and try again until the moment of death. As my 4-year old daughter likes to say, that's okay--- because I still have another chance to learn, grow & love.

It's a shame that it takes momentous tragedies such as this to realize such a basic lesson in life. Life is too short and one can never have too much time to love and sacrifice for each other while we are still here on earth. I know this now and remain grateful to God and the beautiful couple for teaching me such fundamental lesson of life. Yet I also know too well that responsibilities, bills, kids and life will make it fade away with time.

I pray I can hold onto this feeling of humility, gratitude & selfless love just a little longer, even if it means just one more day, one more hour.