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Wednesday, November 7, 2012

BIGBANG: why I can't and won't stop loving them.


Seungri, G-dragon, Taeyang, Daesung, and TOP

It must've been about five years ago when I first came across him in a Korean drama. I grew up watching Korean dramas as a young girl so checking out a new popular drama series was nothing unusual for me. What was unusual though, was this new young male actor with the most intense, dark and beautiful eyes that I've ever seen. I didn't know who he was and where he came from.

My mom, who was sitting right by me, commented that he looks like he's wearing eye makeup and went on to talk about how kids nowadays knew no boundaries when it comes to fashion. I, on the other hand, was intrigued by his mysterious look and a deep curiosity was triggered.

It turns out that he wasn't really an actor but a rapper named TOP in a boy group called Bigbang. I had stopped following and listening to K-pop for some time so I had no clue who they were. Like Korean dramas, I grew up listening to Korean pop in the 90's but there wasn't any music or group that I found particularly endearing and captivating so I often opted for Korean ballads instead.

Even around 2006, K-pop was just K-pop..nothing brilliant or original but rather a clumsy imitation of American and UK pop music with Korean lyrics. They all sounded the same and every group sounded like a copycat version of the other. Every singer in a boy group looked like the next. With same hairstyle, fashion and voice, Korean pop music seemed like one giant blob of B-rated talents.

However, there was something different about Bigbang. First, they began their careers on a survival-type of reality TV series which documents their daily lives and struggles of five young men who dreamed of becoming a star. There were shortcomings, tears and misunderstandings amongst them and the producers and members were portrayed as humans with real feelings rather than puppets. Their talents were lacking in many ways and Top was often criticized for his lack of performance and dance skills.

Eventually the 6th member of Bigbang was eliminated and they debuted with five guys, leader GD "G-Dragon" (Kwon Ji Yong),  lead vocal Teydaddy (Taeyang / Youngbae), rapper (TOP), vocal Daesung (D-lite) and youngest member Seung Ri, who was on the verge of being eliminated from the group as well.

Their first few albums were okay, with a few good catchy songs like Lies...but nothing particularly brilliant. It was better than most songs out in the K-pop scene, but not enough to wow anyone, not even myself. Yet I followed their progress and remained a hopeful fan because I saw the immense potential and talent that lurks underneath.

G-dragon, who began rapping at age 8 with unprecedented talent, was only going to get better with training and time because he carried in him a particular style & swagger that I haven't seen elsewhere. Likewise TOP was born with this incredible voice and flow that can't be duplicated by anyone--and his voice paired with his insanely good looks were only going to attract more and more crazed female fans all over the world.


Unlike G-Dragon & Taeyang who was exposed to spotlight and celebrity life from a young age, TOP was an awkward and overweight teenager who hangs around hyung's and nuna's (older male/female friends) in the underground hip hop scene. Because of this GD is much more flashy with over-the-top swag while TOP carries a rather mature and understated charm that can melt girls' hearts with a single glance. Taeyang is hailed as one of greatest dancer and vocal even by other Korean idol stars.

Sure enough, Bigbang came a long way since their debut in 2006. They produced hit song after another and their album continued to improve in quality and talent. They refused to stick to one genre and continued to experiment with various sounds like hip hop, R&B, electronic, dance, urban, instrumental and created new blends of the mentioned and more.  In fact it's hard to categorize them into a single category because their music consists of many global influences and to this date, I believe there is no musician like them. To me, Bigbang simply sounds like Bigbang and they deserve to be categorized as its own, not compared to other K-pop idol groups and American rappers.

What's also special about this group is that each member has his own distinct style and has his own album to represent this. They perform well not only as a group but as solo artists and I can't think of any other Korean group who carries this kind of skill.

BIGBANG has produced some amazing songs and music videos that blows me away and G-Dragon's newest album One of a kind is by far, one of my favorites by the Bigbang leader. He truly perfected his craft and his musical talents seem boundless and endless. Sometimes he sounds like a masculine & energetic rapper similar to Wu Tang and Lil' Wayne while other times he sings with a delicate and beautiful voice in a heartfelt love song. He travels back and forth this dichotomy effortlessly and plays with lyrics & beat everywhere in between. He is also the epitome of androgynous music & fashion done to perfection but more about this next time.

Music is truly his playground and I have yet to come across musical geniuses like Bigbang. GD makes and produces their music and GD & TOP often work together on the lyrics.  Their music isn't mass produced, corporate recycled junk, it is a true reflection of who they are as artists and their 5+ albums document their growth from young artists to global musicians.

I had the privilege of seeing them live at Honda Center for their first US concert BIGBANG ALIVE GALAXY TOUR both nights and the weekend proved all my speculations and beliefs to be true.  I will write another post dedicated for the weekend of the LA concert. Until then, I'll be jamming to their music and being grateful for the wonderful dream-like weekend I got to spend with my favorite boys- BIGBANG.


Update: Here is a link to the latest article on the leader G-Dragon.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Happy Halloween!


It's Halloween, which officially marks the beginning of my favorite time of the year. This year's Halloween is more festive and fun-filled than usual, with my aunt having a costume party to celebrate her 60th birthday. It was our first time dressing up as family with aunts, uncles & parents and we had such an amazing time. Here I was, complaining about passing time while others were celebrating life as is, as it happens in their later years. Perhaps youth never really passes; innocence & joy does only if we allow it.

Life is too short to complain about things that are passing and being filled with regrets of the past. This is often easier said than done but as I await the holiday season, I remind myself once more to live my life, enjoy what life has to offer, and prepare myself for my next path, whatever that may be.



For my aunt's costume party, I dressed up as Snow White to parallel my girls' fairytale theme, one being Dorothy and the other being Little Red Riding Hood. I needed something family friendly and appropriate for the little ones although I secretly wished I can be something darker & sexier for once.  I think the girls are finally starting to grow out of their Disney Princess phase which means we can start dressing up as cooler characters like Superheroes, Adams Family & vampires hopefully by next year. I can't wait...becoming a mom made me enjoy Halloween so much that I look forward to it more each year.


Dorothy is all ready for Halloween in her Ruby slippers. Little Red Riding Hood is in school and can't wait for trick-or-treating with friends later tonight. Mommy plans to step into her long hooded robe so she can pass out candy and keep the Halloween spirit alive for her little ones as midnight priestess.

Halloween is all about spending time with loved ones, sharing laughter over silly costumes and keeping our innocence alive. It's about feeling like a child again, even for a day- and playing out a persona you've always admired or imagined. Don't let adulthood take that away from you ever; my aunt who just turned 60 and is still fabulous, will agree.

Happy Halloween wherever you are.

Monday, October 15, 2012

A letter to Virginia Woolf

"I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. Oh my dear, I can't be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don't love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defenses. And I don't really resent it."
Vita Sackville West, from a letter to Virginia Woolf dated 21 January 1926.


Are these not the most beautiful words ever?


Today's Inspiration: Maya Angelou


Q: What makes a truly great piece of written word? 

Maya Angelou: The truth...It either tells the truth, or it's not of very much use. 

I came across this poignant interview by Maya Angelou, a writer, activist and thinker whom I have the utmost admiration and fasciation for. It is women like her who makes me hopeful that perhaps I still have a chance at writing something useful and valuable for the generation, or at the very least be one of many representative voices for Asian American women today.

Words connect us across gender, race and social lines, this much is true- but there are experiences that are uniquely ours that deserve its own representation rather than always having to borrow that of writers like Maya Angelou.

This is not to discredit her work and talent of course. She is unprecedented and her mastery with language cannot be duplicated by anyone, but a girl can only dream that one day, I can connect with other souls who yearn to speak out and strengthen her generation like Maya Angelou did for hers.

I always dreamed of this but my dream got muddled with life somewhere along the way. I never knew motherhood was so consuming but it is- and I've learned that I'm not one of those women who can put her career before her children. I wish I was, but I'm not.

But a girl can still dream...

I'm still suffering from this cold that refuses to leave me; my head feels stuffy and clogged, like no worthy thought can enter or leave. I'd rather have a fever than this dull headache. I feel lifeless, thoughtless, dumb and dead.

I must've slept over 20 hours in two days. Something in my body keeps knocking me out to slumber but instead of waking up refreshed, I wake up more tired and lifeless...

I had a dream last night that I was getting dressed for a wedding ceremony. Instead of the usual white wedding dress however, I was wearing this beautiful traditional Korean costume called Hanbok. Something wasn't going as planned and the wedding planner claimed she forgot the candles. What is the meaning of this, I don't know..but I looked beautiful in my reflection and the dress was so colorful, vibrant and exquisite unlike anything I've seen in real life.

Usually I think and overedit when I write but today I'm just gonna tell the truth. Hopefully the more I practice the better my truth will get, not better in fabrication but in honesty and honesty only.